miscellaneous

What nobody tells you pt. 1

**TW EDs**

Hello to whoever has stumbled across this! Doing something a bit different, and sharing a word vomit on here. Might make a series of this, with 3 things each time. Maybe not. I hope it is thought provoking. If you feel triggered, please please seek help or chat to me.

You will lose everything you were hoping to gain, and gain everything you were hoping to lose. It is all a scam.

~ This is my warning to you

The first time you were called fat wasn’t even to your face. You were maybe eight, he was one year older. You’re 100% certain he has no memory of this. Yet you overheard it and there it is, forever ingrained in the cortex of your brain, safely tucked away in its grooves.

and there it is, forever engrained in the cortex of your brain, safely tucked away in its grooves

They don’t tell you how much your throat burns and stomach cramps afterwards. The mess you have to clean up. The bloodshot eyes. The smeared mascara stinging your eyes as they water.

They don’t tell you how you, thinking everything is fine, will suddenly be hit by old habits and urges threatening to pull you down again. It might happen anywhere, anytime, whether an obvious trigger is to blame or not. And it will feel so sweet, like a drug calling your name again. And they don’t tell you how hard you will have to fight, even when you know it is wrong to give in.

They don’t tell you how it’s all a scam. The fasting, the ‘healthy food swaps’, the skipping of meals and worshipping of ‘superfoods’. It will all have been in vain. It doesn’t work. It will never be sustainable in the long run. You will lose everything you were hoping to gain, and gain everything you were hoping to lose. It is all a scam.

All the love in the world,

xo Linda